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ramblings of a really random boy

if I said I had always cared, would I sound like a hypocrite?
I don't know how to speak to you all anymore.
except for the few of you, of whom some I may not know very well, but still make me feel welcome (:
thanks a lot (:

my thoughts are clearer now, but I'm still very mixed up.
at least the concert's over.
I felt very relieved right after that.
it's ironical that I couldn't sleep yesterday morning, even though I wasn't performing.
and I have never been nervous on concert day.

it's also a relief that Mr Tan's not bearing any grudges against me.
apparently he tried to call me but I didn't pick up (?)

however, yes. there are regrets.
but it's okay.
mistakes will always be made.
I just have to move on.

I've been waiting so long for this freedom from band.
but now it just feels weird.

anyway, it really touched me that Gabriel got me to go for handover.
however, I guess I won't go if none of the sec4s inform me to.

yeah, I feel very bad still.
but for those people who think that I'm like an idiot and all.
I don't really care.

I just care about those who matter to me.

and hmm. I'm particularly upset with someone but he isn't from band.
which is funny.

(:

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I think they call it freedom of speech

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ctrl + left click

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watch me waste my life away

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lalala